Why Men Want to Be Just Friends

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What stung the most was what happened after. What do I mean by this?

Her land lady seems interested in breaking us apart. Most women want men that treat them respectfully and can still rock their worlds. Never played games, pursued me with all diligence and made my heart melt.

Why Men Want to Be Just Friends

DO NOT AGREE TO THESE TERMS. THERE IS ONLY ONE WAY FOR A MAN TO WIN IN THIS SITUATION. Ok, she wants you to only be friends. I think you should respect her and stop pursuing her romantically. With that wish, she also has to deal with something else. I suggest that you also do NOT remain friends with her. If there is any chance that she will see you romantically, sooner rather than later or NEVER, the probability of it happening increases DRAMATICALLY if you do not offer emotional support as a friend. This seems mean, but let me tell you, a man NEVER has to offer friendship to a woman. ESPECIALLY if the man is interested in the woman romantically. This is only meeting her emotional needs without getting anything in return. In other words, if you are interested in a woman romantically and settle for a friendship, you are allowing her to step all over you and use you. What do I mean by this? I mean that you are offering her what she needs most emotional support without her having to satisfy your need that romantic connection A man should not stick around and settle for friendship if he wants more. They may not realize this, but they start feeling like they can walk all over you, demand anything, take you forgranted, basically NOT the position you want to be in. You lose respect for a man who will sit around and just be your friend when he really wants more. She starts liking a new guy. You end up being the guy who hears about the new guy. Then you become the pushover who gets to hear about the new guy all the while wishing you were him. If you have any chance of her seeing you romantically, she has to have a chance to miss what you provided her emotionally, and you can only do this if you do not offer her friendship. In my past there was this man who pursued me diligently and I declined, even though I was MADLY attracted to him. I declined because at the time I wanted to be single and I thought he was too young. And God knows, I could never look at you and see you as just a friend. To this day, I still think about him with such high regard. Never played games, pursued me with all diligence and made my heart melt. That was the last time we ever spoke, but he left an impression on me. THAT is how a man needs to react. If things started off smoothly and there were romantic sparks but then something went awry, what I suggest you do is first ask her what happened… Was there ever a romantic spark on her part? If so, what changed it? That way, you can leave the situation having learned something to apply to the next woman you pursue. Then I would LEAVE HER ALONE. She will respond in one of two ways: She will miss you and realize that she does want you and come crawling back… or she will forget about you… and you will forget about her. Either way, you will walk away a winner. In that case, what I mean is that you should not treat her any differently than all the other friends. THAT means that she should not get special treatment. No prolonged one-on-one psuedo dates. Just hang out with her in the group like everyone else. She has to feel that she is NOT any different from the guys who are just your buddies. The issue though is that we have a kid together, so there needs to be contact obviously but the only contact should be about our daughter, short and to the point. The FB statuses are positive, funny I am acting upbeat. In fact she didnt talk to me after she got what she wanted! Is this the right approach? Is this all I can do other than start dating someone else? I have learned so many things through having friendships with guys. Or is this just for guys who are interested in you? Do we stop being friends with that guy? Encourage him to pursue other women. Build up his confidence by telling him what he brings to the table and if there is a way to lovingly tell him things he could change to increase his chance of securing dates with women, tell him. Take a step back. Is there any way you can actually meet her? Some things, like chemistry need actually face to face, especially for a woman. The most important thing you need to do is find a way to actually meet. And when you meet, find an opportunity to steal a kiss! She is keeping you around for emotional support! Ask men who have been around would tell you that. She wants to keep you on a leash! Who does 2 hour skype who are not more than friends? Start seeing other people for real. Hey, send her some of those intimate pictures for kicks! Unless medical problems and so on. Sorry I am a tough guy with guys but not with women. When love I love. Or you are a very small exception or a liar. Or full of shit. Conquering a woman having her love you are two different things. You really know how to win the affections of a girl. We get on fantastically well, but she says she is not interested and just wanted to be friends. She seemed a little shocked and ended the phone call. What am I to make of this? So girls are not used to hearing the guy who is pursuing them does not accept a friendship. Unfortunately only two things will happen if I only pursue a friendship with you. If I agree to your friendship, just know I will NEVER stop trying to pursue you romantically. It is not in my nature to see you as merely platonic. You have so many qualities I want in a partner. It would break my heart to just be your friend if I knew you would never want anything more. I hope you can understand and respect my position. So either accept a friendship with me knowing I will never stop pursuing you romantically, or accept that I must deny you of my friendship. Haha, I think the trick is just trying to feel out the sentiment and having a good awareness of the situation. If it feels like the vibe is anxious at all, you might just try slowing things down for a bit. Hope that makes sense. After a couple of months of me subtly pursuing her, things happened we slept together , and very quickly after she broke up with her boyfriend. After a couple of months of hanging out, she changed her behaviour in a couple of days and said she wants to be friends. And that she is confused. And things happened probably a bit too quickly. I know it is hard to do. I know you think the loving thing to do is be her friend, but first you have to love yourself. You have to let go of this friendship if you are in love with her. How else will you make room in your life to find someone who will love you back? You are not doing ANYTHING wrong by withholding your friendship from someone. In fact, you are doing something RIGHT for you. Why suffer like that? Make room in your life for women who can see a potential in you romantically. Opposite sex friendships only work if both parties see it platonically. I met her at a conference, we had dinner and drinks and did a couple of non-romantic, non-sexual activities together and were in touch online for 2 months or so we live in different countries. We were in touch daily 2 or 3 times a day, sometimes. I was not planning on telling her my feelings until I met her in person, which was to be in the fall. I sent a gift, which she accepted with virtual hugs and kisses. She began to tell me about her frustrations and loneliness etc. When I asked her if there was any hope at all if something romantic happening, she said could not imagine that. What amazes me is that you had the guts to even imagine that I would consider you romantically- you poor slob of a eunuch. There no sugar coating it guys- face it, this is exactly what any girl who pulls the friends card is thinking. I had a crush on girl who is my family friend. Who had a breakup and single. Suddenly we started speaking on long calls and late night chats. She proposed me and asked me to marry her. I was very happy and just enjoying my happiness. When I met her first time she felt good. Post tow days she told me that she is still loving her past boy friend. I told her go back to him check if he is single but he was not and he told her she is just a friend of his.. She was broken and chasing him. One fine day she said she does not love me and want to be single.. And said you are my best friend. This all happened in one month. Pls suggest me the next step of action. Talking with her on phone for hours is a big turn off for a girl, because with time she feels that she is talking to her girl friend or to an emotional tampon. When a girl gets out of a long relationship, her feelings are so raw and she is not emotionally stable. Your actions should be the following: 1. Start dating other girls as soon as possible. When you meet a girl who likes you and chasing you, you will totally forget about the girl that friend zoned you. Note: I am in your exact same situation, I am trying to forget the girl who friend zoned me. When I told her that I can not be her friend, she blocked me on facebook and stopped talking to me since then! It hurts, but I know she respected what I did although she lost her emotional support from me. When a woman says that to me,I firmly reject the offer,and cut all ties. No phone calls,no flowers,no door mat! There are many,many other fish in the see,and life is just too short,to stand on the dock and wait for the one that got away,to swim back to me. We had a lot of things in common but she wanted to take things slow. I walked her home and we were discussing doing more active dates rather than dinner and just talking. I said if she needed time, I was open to taking things slow. We kissed she kissed back , and the next day through phone I told her that the convo the other night about the status of this relationship was good for its honesty. I am more confused than anything else. Why does she think you are better off as friends? We recently got back from a trip just after Christmas through New Years. She has a bad past history of relationship not one guys has treated her well or not cheated on her. I was different from her norm and was none of that. Always there for her and treating her like a queen. She was constantly in a state of flux i need space but then coming right back. When we got back from our trip she wanted to talk and the talk was a joke. She said she was annoyed by the flowers got them once a month and I was telling people we were in a relationship never did that but said we were dating. I think I got to close and she pushed me off. Her daughter really liked me as well. Casual is we talk here and there. I tell her I understand that and I think about you every day and pray for you and your well being every day. Sends me a picture of her at 1:12am. A day later sends another pic saying her daughter made the sign so I keep my answers short and positive. Next day she asks was I coming to work out with her anytime soon. I was giving you space that you need to heal and grow. I send a response saying you know I care about you and I told you I wanted to see where things go but you are hesitant. I think we need to communicate more effectively. I have been giving you space and honoring your request. I would like to talk a little more to provide support for each other. Two days later she says we can move forward but I am offering friendship…nothing else!! To me that was her trying to control things and keep me in her life as she sorted herself out. I responded with I gave it some thought. She said take care. What do you think about this Midori? What do you think of this conditional friendship Andrew? I made it clear to her that I wanted more than just her friendship. What she has written on her profile is only going to get her negative attention and honestly these guys are only going to come at her about sex. I have been there for her this entire time as well as her daughter, but she is the one who pushed me away. I have told her in the past that we could take things slow and that I am a patient person. I think she knows what I bring to the table and wanted to keep me around for her own benefit but I am not doing that. Let me ask you what will offering friendship RIGHT NOW do? She has a bad history of choosing men so the one man who was there through good and bad even when she lashed out at him is the one she pushed away. There was a girl who sent me a message on a website and we started to chat everyday, she always initiated the conversation, sent pics about her day etc. We went two dates on the first date we kissed and even went further which made me concerned that she rushed it a bit. Then she said she recently broke up with her bf so she is not ready for a relationship now and i said its okay i can wait for her. After a week we went on another date and i played it cool and distant a bit, then she held my hand and kept holding it till we leave and after that she said its better for me not to wait for her because she has no feelings for me and said its better to remain friends which i answered saying i dont want to be friends with her and we dont talk anymore. Can you please give me and advice? Are you afraid I will hurt you? Tell me in the time we have been together, what has changed? I want to be with you. I want to fight for what we have. Be confident, be concerned, show her you care for her and that she has no reason to be afraid. A lot of the time, women get scared and run away when things move too fast physically and they are not quite ready to go into a physical relationship. Tell her you can take a step back if she is uncomfortable with how fast things are moving, but you only see her as a romantic interest, not a platonic interest. She gave me a big smile and she blink her left eye to me. Upto now I feel so sorry to myself , Kindly help guys I really need her in my life. Sorry for the late response. Well, the last several months I have been able to get to know this girl really well. I would take my lunch breaks there where she works to eat lunch. We had instant chemistry and flirted every time we would see each other with our eyes, verbally and with our smilies. I have been friends on Facebook before this but never really recognized her before. She has been successfully to continue to tear the wall down with me. She has her own wall up from a bad previous relationship where she has a daughter from. She is a single mom. We would send each other messages on Facebook with some flirty in nature. She asked several people in the community about me and my character and the type of person I was as I continue to come to work more often to eat. She told me that she asked people about me. Well, I was at church about a month ago. I looked over and there she was. She was already looking at me smiling and waving. That night I communicated to her that we are in a gray area and told her I would like to see you more and see where this goes. I told her that I am respecting her wishes but now I want take your advice and tell her otherwise. I cancelled the order because of the possible conflict it may cause with her getting flowers in front of her coworkers and them asking her about them and who sent them. What should I do next? I am head over heels for her and have treated her like a Princess. You need to wholeheartedly eccept that friendship! Stop thinking with your dick and enjoy the ladies company as a FRIEND. Two things will happen. You will either end up with a great friend for life or the love of your life. But not until you put sex completely off the table until your foundation is laid firm. Women do make great friends, and if it is just about sex, then you are right…think of women as friends. However, if a man is interested romantically or a woman is interested romantically for that matter they should not stay around and subject themselves to being hurt by seeing their love interest pursue other people. Take care of your emotional well-being first. So I tell her that was never my intention nor did I want to be friends, but I feel terrible because I know it hurt her. We have blocked each other on social media.

Is that a 90s sitcom plot or what. I met him and I felt overwhelmed. He kept texting but I replied so late. I never thought of him as particularly attractive. If you've ever heard these guys discuss why they did what they did openly, you'll find that most of them believe the girl played games with them. Don't let any rom-com u you think otherwise. After all, we are all prone to occasional lapses in judgement.